GIFTS OF SOBRIETY
We asked these clean and sober individuals with different lengths of recovery what they love most about being sober and what they find most challenging
BY PAULO MURILLO
GENUINE CONNECTIONS
“What I love about being sober today is everything. I’m actually having fun in sobriety. I’ve been trying to get out more and talk to people more, because I’m still kind of shy and standoffish, but I enjoy being sober. I like that I can make genuine connections with people, versus talking about gibberish and all that drama. I can remember things that happen in my life today. I have good friendships, and I’m close with my family now. My relationship with my higher power has strengthened. I’m not in a romantic relationship yet, but I am still looking. Most importantly, my relationship with myself has been very, very successful. I’m getting to know myself a bit more now that I am sober and doing the work, and I’m so happy about that. In terms of challenges, I can’t think of any right now. I just like to take it slow, and I don’t really stress out about much.”
—Ayanna Kapri, sober since January 9, 2018.
STAY IN TODAY
“I find that I have a lot more of a social life, and I’m a lot more present when I’m not using. It’s given me the opportunity to build and improve upon that. I mostly love not being alone. When I came back to recovery, I was alone and couldn’t function. I was unemployable, didn’t have any money, and more importantly, I couldn’t function socially at all. As far as what I find most challenging… I have intrusive thoughts about using, but what’s most challenging is not having the career that I want. I don’t know what I want to do for a career, but I want something more than entry-level jobs. I beat myself up constantly about that, but I can’t take that on right now because I’m new. So, I just stay in today, stay on the path of stability, and I do it every day.”
—Michael Butler, sober since September 11, 2023.
LOVE MYSELF MORE
“I love having a clear mind. I love my connection to my higher power. I’m not a menace to society, and I get to build relationships with people that aren’t based on transactions. I’m grateful to be sober. I found that I love myself more due to the program of recovery, and I’m discovering more about who I am. I thought I knew myself, but I didn’t know myself at all. Recovery is teaching me how to know myself and how to love the person I am today… What I find most challenging is that I sometimes feel like I’m spiraling. It can be hard to stay open-minded to suggestions and take direction. Also, on a day-to-day basis, it’s a challenge to turn my will over to my higher power. I thought I could run my own life, but I see that I can’t. So, I have to turn that over each and every day. I’m grateful to do that, but sometimes I want to do it my way.”
—Tavarius Webster, sober since July 11, 2023.
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